The conditions of my eyes is so bad, I am actually thinking about going on a diet. Considering how bad I am with dieting discipline, I will go see the doctor (pun intended) to order me into giving my eyes a break. Ears I can be without, but losing eyesight is starting to annoy me. One day without looking at any kind of a screen?? In this day and age? But I plan to do so. Perhaps even two days - from, say, Wednesday noon, whole of Thursday and until Friday noon. But of course that's not gonna be possible. Maybe Friday nine:)))

The General watched Prometheus with me. Not the director's cut, just the normal version. He was oddly quiet during the whole three hours. I think he might have liked it. There were certainly several of the cast to like and the visuals give even me the hard-on...

I've invented two new words. "Fridayshoot" and "greatnessdaughter". Greatness daughter because 'granddaughter' means the kid's kid, whereas as far as Theo is concerned, one would be his descendant, only quite up a bit. Hence greatness, other than greatgreatgrand. 

Grape harvest tomorrow. Maybe Sundays ought to be my visual diet day, but we have the five o'clock panel sessions on Sundays. Buggeration. How would that even work?!

Friday's shoot - earrings and eyeglasses

Difficult day, but I made some of the Friday shoot's pickies... I will edit some of them into a more commercial-looking form at some point, but lately, I can barely focus my eyes...

The queen of beauty in my crazy boudoir

I was actually scared yesterday, if one can believe it. Me, the infamous communist, anarchist, stoic as of late, scared of being in the same room with a crowned head?! Well, I suppose I wouldn't be, if she was aloof. Then my bile canons come up. But I can understand why people would tremble in awe in front of someone in position, though, now. Truth is, I really didn't want to fuck up. You don't just GET the opportunity to photograph the most beautiful woman in the country and fuck it up. Nor do you just smack the make up you just invented two nights before on her perfect face and fuck (it) up. I imagine I was afraid of making a laughing stock in the photographer and all the Alex Box fans community, out of myself. Namely by having this set and dropping off the par like a rotten tomato. It was fairly wild, the set, joyously so :D Everyone was in my home, artists, direction, all the young models and Bishop was zapping from one bag to the next, one lap to the next, drinking makeup water and paint and stealing pizza :)))

              Nives (that means show, by the way) was beyond lovely. Man, when she walked into the room you could see she doesn't quite walk on earth. She was in fact this tiny, dark eyes brunette in a cute dark dress and a jeans jacket and still, when she smiled, I would start shaking. Beauty, you know? I am the one who can prove to you, anyone, any face can be a model - but to shoot a face that's been shot three hundred times before and make it look better, NEW other than everyone to come and past - now that's a challenge. And if she had not complied, I suppose the chance would pass. But she liked the sketches and she was, like, the nicest person ever. Remove earrings, no problem. Get your face cowered in dark paint? For certain. Get on the floor, while people hold paper napkins all over you and get sprayed with watercolours? Fun, right! Add Bishop, who used her as a playing buddy during and the light.... When she starts shooting, she starts touching her face as if she loved herself, all the while focusing so deeply at the camera, it made my hair stand on end. You could tell she was a model before she became the beauty representative. Yeesh. I am in awe indeed from the experience. Also, I think the pickies came out  fairly cool :D

Posing here for the Audition's weekly challenge of selling the cool wooden-framed glasses and Drej's earrings. Girls were presented with the hard task of upping this :)

The makeup detail of the fashion show's concept

... which I am testing tomorrow on the this year's beauty queen...

STAF

When the printer of T-shirt sayings takes your .pdf and somehow manages to misspell a five letter word, you start to think this universe is simply trying to make you smile. Thus, wearing nothing but a work T-shirt saying Staf on the back, I proudly announce myself to be the official photographer of the Seriously, nay Totally Attractive Fun Project Audition :D

 ... and here are some of the rest of the hotties of our roaming backstage

Getting really hyped about designing some clothes for the fashion show :D

Of nightmares and stuff

Sometimes I think my key problem is living in a poorly chosen genre. I've dealt with this assumption before and reading things lately, I am faced with it again. (Seneca. Long story. Another failed stoic.) You know how some people want their lives to be a pink shaded romantic comedy and it's actually a depressing Ohio suburbs low-budget housewife drama?
           Everything is a matter of perception. Everything. I get so desperately lonely sometimes. I'm not talking about my love life - my love life is frightfully perfect. But my life in general is set up like it's a perky, silly, cynical adventure tale of, dunno, Capt. Mal Reynolds, whereas living it can feel like a really really bad soap. Like an incredibly watered down and poorly translated Anna Karenina. Which at times makes me incredibly tired. And as result, I get so terribly sad.

             In theory, one must always aim to breach the limits of a safe zone, and evolve. Being a team player for me is one of such things. I've never had friends and hated team playing. It's not my thing. I like company in general, especially peers, but that's mostly because I am very fond of stories and people can be very interesting. Also, sometimes, they have different opinions and that bitch-slaps the perspective back where one was clearly lacking.
              In theory, I could have great photo shoots. I used to. I would choose a model, choose the concept, improvise and enjoy creating light and magic out of it. That's the part I already knew how to do. Now I am supposed to tell other people how to do the styling and makeup and hope they can keep up. And models are even more lost than me. There is too much of everything. Everybody is trying to put their part into it, until in the end it's an inedible cake. All that matters in the end is the photo. If only people believed me when I tell them I am the photographer.
              It was nice when it was just me and my work. Now I am too tired to draw a fucking dress design, because halfway through, I just get to thinking - why the fuck do I bother? It won't be used or liked or appreciated anyway. Why don't I just try to pay my rent instead? Be one of the normal people? ...
              Enter the facepalm.

             Well - all that, all this - this would make for an excellent perky, silly, cynical adventure. There is so much creativity, drama, tempo, characters and potential (oh, and sex, there is so much sex and romance, never look down on that) here, this would be a craaazy adventure story.
             So shift the fucking genres, bitch. Winter is coming! ... If you think Ned Stark had issues - neither your flat nor your car have heating. Your diplomacy skills are at the all time low. You have nightmares about people taking away your cat just to see you squirm and suffer some more. What does that tell you? If nightmares about people threatening your pussy are not a final alert, I don't know what is.

Today's shoot