I'm writing (about 60, 70 pages in) Marowit's lessons to Kay that involve choosing what to forge, choosing who to mingle with, teaching her how to make a decision and to stand behind it by introducing her to several cool people that she can relate to. They talk about her bodyguards and he says 'You never talk to them' and she says 'They're dicks' and then he takes her though Hangele's whole life and his death so that she would learn how to see pass the bullshit into the story. They talk about great things as good friends and you can see Kay grow as an individual. They almost get to weaving her a moral fiber, but are distracted by the battle. Problem is, all of these conversations once belonged to Morpheus, they were there to show her predicament. Kay's final decision is who gets to live and inherit the throne and which one of the two goes away for ever. The book begins with that moment of deciding and then dives into the relationship of Kay and Marowt and what a great pair they made when creating the pagans. I will have to come full circle when Morpheus returns some fifty pages on, to throw Kay off her conviction. It used to be whom she is loyal to, now it will slowly become whom she trusts to finish her education for better or for worse. 

I'm in a strange place. It shows in the text. I had a really odd moment yesterday and I still don't know whether I did the right thing or made a terrible mistake. My head was so full yesterday I had trouble falling asleep, although I was dead tired from working in the vineyard. Still, no thought would form and no single emotion took over. I was bursting at the seams, but it felt so surreal.