Days are still up and down. Still fucking worried about dad. There is only so much we can do to cheer mum up, she misses her vital, adventurous husband :/  It's just a mess. He has the annoying tendency to pretend everything is great until it is almost too late. Plus the doctors are a fucking sham - nobody tells us ANYTHING. We don't even know which reactions are normal. I worry without pause. 

... But the world is so pretty. I sat in the vineyard while G saw to bees, watching snails and ladybugs and listening to birds and wind. So damn perfect. Everything wants to live and dance, from ants to the sky.

I'll probably go to the woods again tomorrow, just to chill, so we went to the shooting range today. My stance is improving, if I fired one shot too soon and missed completely. G is trying to explain this isn't the army, I don't need to shoot fast, but I wanted to see what would happen. 'Course, his recharge is stiff as all. Empty cases were flying everywhere. 

My brain is at that odd division point where I want to nap in the hay and play with kittens, or blow something up. I mean like a watermelon. Not a ShinRa reactor.