Dracula in a gondola

Midsummer, the summer solstice, the full moon at the end of June, my marriage anniversary - the specific date itself eludes me, but it is generally my favourite time of the year. Adventurer's mojo is strongest in hot summer nights, when fireflies roam the countryside and animals make scary sounds in the forests, where landscapes are silver and the wind is a harbinger of thunderstorms that hit amazingly locally. To sleep outdoors in the countryside at a time like this is a particular kind of bliss. 

That was my only 10th-anniversary wish - I mean besides the with that we travel Europe this year, which pandemics and all thwarted. But G had a day off and the plan was to go to his parents' fields and set up hammocks there even on a Friday - Friday being the only day the whole month that could have had any precipitation. We moved the plans, so it didn't, but if we tried to sleep outside, I'm sure cats and dogs would rain aplenty. 

Last night there was a neighbour's after-birthday picnic, so we went there, a cushy small garden event with too much food and some friendly catching up. I tried to pet an adolescent kitten, which slapped me so hard I now look like an old Celt warrior, with cut marks running from my mouth to my ear, half a Glasgow smile. Before nightfall, I sought the oldest, most remote pair of trees in the fields and the General helped me with the ropes, trying to teach him basic 8-knot - I let him have my hammock, me testing a small cheap one (which didn't come with ropes.) You can always tell how people trust in the hammock by how far above the ground it's set - in this case, not at all. My butt was touching the grasses. Illyria, tied to one of the trees, made herself a nest in the grass and watched over us and, wouldn't you know, that kitten showed up and insisted on sleeping on top of me all night. 

General was so cute. He is not used to hammocking - not sure how it works and not at all sure it's safe at all - we got him a huge sleeping bag (namely meant for a couple), yet he lay in the hammock, like Dracula in a long thin boat, refusing to improvise (those hammocks are so large you can sleep sideways or even across quite comfortably.) He complains of a sore back now, but in truth, once the dogs stopped barking at barking foxes and deer, and owls stopped trying to land on the trees and the cat stopping to purr like a steam engine, his pleasant snoring began and he was out. I was too preoccupied with taking care of his comfort to sleep, freezing in my K-mart get-up, my jaw hurt from an inflamed lymph node and at some point moon rolled over us, like an airport spotlight, making everything impossibly bright. Uu, but before that, when the night was still pitch black, fireflies filled the valley!! The kitten tried to chase some, unsuccessfully and tried to get the dog to play with her, suggesting they assault my sandals, or one of Okti's tentacles, or my face.  

Once it got bright, tops of the mountains colouring orange, I got up to take a long stroll around the basin - fields having been clad in the thinnest morning mist, roe deer nibbling between wheat fields, birds looking for berries, and the grasses high and wet with dew. In my brain, it was still the weekend, so when small industries and traffic began to stir all around, it was kind of too soon. Still. Off I went, to the farmhouse, to get some coffee and the Kindle and brush my teeth and pee, and then return to listen to G snore. Just as I was approaching, I watcha a dew-drenched kitten (it has a long white and black coat) hang by a single nail off his hammock, seemingly changing its mind about assaulting him in my absence. For a cat with no survival instinct, it had an excellent survival instincts :)))

Muffin paint

 Not saying it's hot, but some of my paint has baked instead of dried O.o

I tend to troll on Facebook quite hard, because the stupidity of users there is overwhelming, I have a need to vent, and I do get thrown out of groups almost within days, however, the one thing I do honestly declare, is that when you have a gut feeling about a customer, don't ignore it. 

Am getting that lately, this potential buyer constantly asking - in a demanding sense, not in an inquiry sense - for adjustments to her pre-purchase. It's a custom purchase, savagely discounted and the latest, well, 'order' from them was that I should switch off the tax tab, as they are in the US and should not pay the tax. I tried looking for the tab and asking whether that means I then have to pay it, but there is no such tab, I've never heard of it being an option and it's an Etsy thing, not mine, automatic. I just stalled the whole thing and will delete it in a few days, re-listing the lot eventually. It feels entirely like a Karen, who will find a tiny bubble in one of the paints and demand a full refund or somesuch. They are curt and demanding, not talking down on me directly, but such a stretch from my usual customers, that it just ... Naaaw, sorry. I'm not getting the 'I hope you love my paint!' vibe here. I think I'll pass.

There is, for example, a lovely, lovely customer whom we chat with quite a bit and we both have anxiety, so we easily relate to most social situations being a 'no, thanks', to whom I managed to forget to add two requested paints TWICE. Freaking TWICE! I did everything else right, wrapped her others, added extras, sent it, it arrived super fast ... But she reminds me we agreed on those two paints back when I was still making them. And I'm like, fuck, yes. I'm so sorry. And she goes: lemme just buy some more from you, and you'll add it then!! ... And, yes, again, my overcooked brain fucks up. Instantly I say I'll ship it TODAY, and AGAIN she's, like, "Awww, but can I just pay for them, so you don't waste money on the stamps? You've already given me so much extra paint!" (Of course I didn't let her pay. I don;t need the money, I need people to enjoy drawing!)

You get awesome customers that make this job so sweet, and then you get that gut feeling - and trust me, in this sudden latest heat, in me constantly running out of time, one bad customer can depress the hell out of ye. I've set myself a full week of on the 16th, and until then, I wanna make a ton of stuff, which - since I'm not sleeping much - I am. However. It's POSTING it that's problematic. It's too hot for me to photograph them, I get nauseous by the bright window. I have told myself to try it slowly, just three or so sets per day. I'll try that. For now, I'm just making new paint - the General took me directly to the pigment store and I spent almost all of our weekly savings on new supplies. Not to mention some are drying up like peppers. It looks like the soil in my dad's old vineyard, where we tried to plaint honey-savvy plants and the soil is literally bright beige dust and gravel. Grapes love it, but everything else needed a whole irrigation system. Which means a lot of me, standing on the terraces with a hose in my hands, playing 'aim'. :D

Zombie movie questions ...

My brain can be problematic when watching zombie movies. Quora isn't much help. Does rotting horse zombie carcass meat still have nutrients? What happens to the dung beetles and the butterflies if they feed on the undead? Do you get sick if YOU bite a zombie? How did Rick Grimes survive for days without food and water whilst unconscious at the start of Walking dead? (Also his nails were very neat.) What propels heavily decayed undead if they have no elasticity in their muscles and joins? Why some growl and hiss if their lungs don't work? Why don't they all have stubble? Why is there evidence of blood pressure when they're injured, if their hearts don't work? Is the reason many of them have ruptured stomachs because they keep feeding but cannot digest and they just blow up? How come you need to be alive when infected, why don't the long-time-dead & embalmed just get bitten and recruited from the graves? How does freezing, scorching or soaking affect them, exactly? Can goldfish become zombies? Wouldn't rats spread such an infection? 

... and one about logistics: Isn't the highest banknote in US circulation a 100 dollar bill, so wouldn't 200 mil weight, like, a ton, and hardly fit along with 10 people in that tiny helicopter? 

Yes, by the look of me, the army pants, the leather jewelry, the tactical watch, the belt knife, the jungle-ready canvas bag and the dark glasses, you may think I am just coming from securing a prehistoric archaeological dig and on my way to fight a zombie outbreak, I frown and walk like I mean business. I mean, you can tell I can assemble an AK47 with my eyes tied. 

I also carry a plushie octopus in the bag and hide behind books when perfectly polite people approach me to shake my hand. 

Like, seriously, don't talk to me. I prefer aloneness. 

Little pleasures (Just saying, lining sticky paint is not as easy as it looks :D )

 

Army of the Dead, 2021

So, as fuckable villains go, this movie certainly has one, albeit he looks a bit Uruk Hai-ish in some scenes and it would not be the first deranged zombie I find romantically interesting, but for a change, there is at least a sense of character to him - how rarely do you go into a zombie movie and expect to root for the villains? With the exception of a crappy dull romance comedy from a few years ago, warm Bodies, I think it was, zombies rarely have anything to say. Even there, the guy eventually reverted. I would have loved to see a lot more of their hierarchy and stories.

So, the first rule for this flick is, do not, and I stress again, do NOT use your brain to watch it. It spoils the mood. The story makes absolutely no sense. I agree when people say that Snyder gets shit for not being Milosh Forman or some such, because if you go into this movie aware it's a retarded parody, it's one of the more enjoyable ones. The budget was impressive, the cast is lovely, (also re-cast is one of the cooler characters), the kills are awesome and the drama is peppered in, just enough to make you invested. You hate the slimy rapist guard, you feel bad about the dead baby alien zombie and you feel like shit when Dave Bautista dies. That man is HUGE, by the way. Holy fucking cow, those biceps. 

Plus, you know, you get to see Vegas all fucked up, complete with zombie tigresses, ravaging strippers and explosions and there's Wagner and time paradoxes and architecture models with little helicopters on them and YouTubers being YouTubers and LOTS of shooting big fat guns. And there's a lot of negative commentary on the subject of slo-mo and depth-of-field, but I love that! I always loved a good death-of-field shit, COMBINED with slo-mo! Whoo! The glitter on the queen's dress, when she is going out of focus, or the scene where Zeus comes in from behind the plastic curtains. Come on. That's majestic. Anyone can make a depressing gloomy crappy dystopian wasteland zombie movie. But this is a Vegas zombie movie. there's sequins and Liberace and shit. 

Since they mentioned it, everyone was hoping for that rain, right? :D

 LOL, I feel like I'm turning into a cat - I just received a monthly dose of vintage stickers, but you should see the adorable sleeve folder it arrived into! The packaging was almost more exciting than the goodies! :D

In other news, I am almost done with the Summer batch (I think it's 12. No idea. Too overwhelmed with work.) and it was a doozy. Over 100 original paints, three huge sets, several granulating extras, three sets of trinkets and that's just the first output - sets and adventure sets will come much later! Plus, of course, a lot of old primaries, and I have some more pigment to make them, but I'm running out of stamina. I have to make the final fillings on these, several freaking huge trays of 'em, and then make their swatches. I hope I don't run out of paper. I bought all of the paper of that fav sort in the land. Not to mention we are almost out of money. I've taken a month longer than I thought I would. But at least for now, I should be well set until August. Oooh, the yummy paints!!

Oh, did I mention, I had another tick the size of a labrador - it burrowed into the front calf and it felt like someone is pinching the bone. I made the mistake of googling what tick jaws actually look like. Between that and zombie movies with fuckable antagonists, this was another unpleasant parasite encounter. namely, the second time the damage done literally turns into a bruise. Okay, the first one was on my tummy and tummy skin is thin. Fine. But lower leg?? It HURT having it pulled, it took a while and the damn thing caused freaking vascular damage. What happened to all those ticks you barely noticed and left but a mosquito bite? I had thousands, they were but a nuisance as one worries about deseases. But these are getting freaking ridiculous. 

It's still raining all the time. We have no opportunity to mow the vineyard and the bees have nothing to eat. We have to feed them all the time. Other than that they are adorable. Busy bees. All but one hive are really pleasant to inspect. The satanic one is as satanic as ever. I have to make sure G doesn't make duplicates out of that one. They have a temper like a kicked wasps nest.