Saturday 13 March 2010

Perhaps I give some people too much majesty. Perhaps it's just as well, considering i often come out as a rude snob or simply a demagog. Generally I don't like people, but if I do, I make (subconciously) a really big deal about it. I tend to idolize. 
                  As casualy as I could, I've sent a text message to another author that I hold in very high regard and got the exact same response that I would give in her shoes and yet disarming. She speaks in the sort of "quit wasting my time and tell me what you want" tone that I cannot just beaut around of. I can't be shy and honored she's recieving me. It's totall bull. She's agreed to meet me, in fact invited me to her place and she didn't do it to recieve a groupie. She wants to talk to me as a grown up. I think. I could be wrong. I'm still afraid. I suppose I would have the exact same feeling about getting the chance to meet Zemotion. She's a lot younger and a lot more timid and I really like her and yet knowing all that, I'd have to constantly remind myself I'm a talented professional just the same while trying to get beneath the fame. Anyhoo, it's uncanny. More so that I really like that feeling of being in awe :p

I'm thinking - except financially, obviously - life is actually really good. I may have hurt the car uninetntionally, causing even more of repair bills (backing onto a frozen snow bank I may have damaged the oil pipe) but at least it turns out I won't have to got to the dentist... *unjinx the jinx, quickly!*.. The toothache that's been giving me nightmares and waking me up all night's proved to be - followed by a gum infection -  pice of sunflower seed from the bread I like - the size of half of my tooth, lodged so deep within, I didn't get it out after two days of insistent brushing. I've given up on the hope it's a foreign object causing my gums to burn so badly, and then I punctured the swelling and saw the thorn. Thing is, the teeth there are so oddly repaired, left right and center, at one part the filling just goes from one to the next, leaving a bit of a space underneath and it's where the seed got stuck. 5 minutes after I got it out the pain and tension was gone, making my jaw feel 5 punds lighter. (Which means I'm gaining weight again, as I've gained 5 someplace else O.o)

hehe, I'm so used to toothache I almost name my teeth by moods. Idiots. But beside that, I'm gonna go put some real food into my tummy and listen to Queen Margot's OST. It started last night (Aleluja!) as I needed a backsound to commemorate my first Titanium Ore mining :P Working on the back colophone.