Wednesday 16 December 2009

Slowly and surely the year is coming to a close. I'm going to try to finish the book until the end and this would mean solid 15 days of time, but as it's December, cold and gray as it may be (still no snow :( ) I will be lucky to get one day of real productivity out of it. On the down side, as far as the year is concerned, we still have debt to some of our associates - but not nearly as much as we could if we failed alltogether - and on the plus side, despite the fact in my oppinion the pace is painstakingly slow and the spread of the fame depressingly shy, we are happy and fat. Oh, and we have to go on a diet because we are too happy and fat. :p

Though I feel bothered, at times, everyone wanting me to handle everything about this business (though better now that a little tear has been shed), I suck my inspiration from Zemotion and have bad dreams about the little camera of my sister's.. I SO need my own. So much. I got the idea to draw a painting for the new library to donate it, but the moment I wanted to get it out of my system, that jerk from te travel agency called said he's back and he wants me to return to work on his stuff. I am not taking any more comissions till the end of the year. No, I am not giving discouts on my work either. No, I don't think the cards the too expensive - take a look at the ones that cost one third of the price, feel the paper, see the motif.. No, I don't want to go to another exhibition opening and no, I don't care for praise. Praise doesn't pay the bills. And no, I don't want to have a drink with some guy just because he knows people who have galleries in a slightly bigger town. I PAINT. That is what I want to do. If I have so much of everything else in my life, then I cannot see what i'm supposed to be painting and I feel blind altogether. Let others manage me. Or perhaps if they're so clever, let THEM paint and I'll manage them.

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