Saliva

I KNOW this is a freakishly unusual topic, as lubricants often are, but as I lay in the dentist's chair today and that awful suction hissing thingy was helping me not to gag, I thought how much I miss my spit when lacking in. The feel of latex gloves pulling and tugging on my dry cheek, at times even rubbing against the thinnest inner-mouth membrane in a way I thought might tear at it, and pinching and scraping my lips ... Once the doctor put a ball of mould rubber into my mouth and over time the suction thingy began to irritate my other teeth and we removed it, five minutes later, when he took the impression out, everything was wet and slimy and juicy. I loved it. It looked terrible, but it didn't hurt. It felt natural and organic. Believe me, I drool A LOT when I sleep. Could be because some part of my mouth is always hurting, or if I take a nap after eating, I am notoriously slimy. There are whole anecdotes about it, even illustrations. But between being slobbery and being dry, I'll take my snail soul any time.