Saturday, 28 June 2014

Two unexpectedly pleasant surprises today – first the General managed to fuck me into unconsciousness again (this isn't a metaphor, he actually works me up to such an absurd orgasm I go into a hysterical seizure, screaming, kicking, crying crocodile tears, my spinal fluid boiling and every nerve trembling for hours and then I pass out for an hour or so, only to awake stoned and kind of stupid :D ) and the second was his family’s picnic. 
Normally I would be terribly against going into a family affair of fifty plus individuals, considering my family only consists of about five people and most of us are crossed at another vast majority of the time… But this was unexpectedly wonderful. General’s parents belong to a clan on 20 or so still living cousins, descending from 8 brothers and sisters, and they meet every year to catch up (so funerals wouldn’t be the only occasion they do.) I attended these before, but I was always too shy to talk to people, so I just sat miserably thorough the afternoon and felt bad when they wouldn’t allow me to photograph them. But now I talked to most and I listened to some really cool ‘war’ stories – like the time the two massively built brothers thought it would be a good idea to wrestle a circus bear or when we got a tour though the trophy room from one of their hunting trips to Africa. (Those little gazelles (gnus) aren’t half as little as they seem on TV and that makes you wonder how big those little lionesses actually are … O.o )
Also, there was FEWD. Like, fucking loads of fewd. These people come from a farm – one thing they know how to do better than most humans is bake. I ate, again, so much, I nigh burst. I started keeping it down to veggies and BBQ meat, but then the sweets came on… With Ramadan coming up, I’ve decided to fast respectfully on one of my favourites, so I chose sugar – thirty days of no sugar in my fewd. Funny, even as I’m going into it, I am starting to find things too sweet. That’s uncanny; a while ago I wouldn’t imagine there is such a thing. Someone even suggested I give up my truly greatest passion – my camera – but seeming as I only just truly picked it up, that would be counterintuitive. Some day, though. It needs to become an obsession again. Then I’ll strain.