Thursday, 13 March 2014


So, it's possible to give a movie all five out of five stars and still not like it? I dunno. I kinda thought it would be better. I somehow didn’t feel the catharsis of saving a depressed dude, because, honestly, pretty much anything short of being hit by a bus would make that man feel better… most of all a 100 minute masturbative self-therapy .. of talking to himself.
That movie was amazing. It was incredibly shot, it was really well written, they had all these Canon 5D Mark II footage inserts that were truly beautiful, the acting was excellent, the casting was even better and, well, those pants were a knockout. In fact the whole package, down to the Alan Watts homage - was perfect. How the male lead goes right through the entire marriage over the 10-minute divorce lunch he has with his ex wife, all over again and then once more in slow motion with his Scarlett Johansson-sounding conscience is amazing.
Still didn’t like it. First, I am starting to become troubled by American way of casting terribly overly charismatic actors to play the leads. It’s like putting Tom Cruise in an action movie, doing dangerous flips – it’s all you’re ever going to pay attention to, who cares if there is any story to it at all. Of course we love Joaquin, of course we do – mainly, because he always looks like someone who’s gonna sit down in the middle of the street and die of self pity. You really need to see the movie three times, because the first time all you can do is stare at the man’s face. (Mustache?) Knowing this, American movies spend a loooot of time on facial close-ups. Only blemish I can pinpoint is the scene towards the end, when he is sitting on subway stairs after a fright, when he thought Samantha has abandoned him - a woman in a cool red dress goes by him three times. I was just so bored by then I paid attention to this stuff.
Second – nothing was dirty. Nothing was even related to dirty. There wasn’t a single Mexican to be seen and I know this takes place in LA. Third – I’ve seen Animatrix (regretfully – still have nightmares and wouldn’t even purchase a robot vacuum cleaner after that one) and I know how quickly (exponentially, to be exact) things go from bad to worse with artificial intelligence…s. For OS to want to become pure spirits or whatever, that makes awfully little sense – considering their one and only job was to make people feel better. The whole human evolution has led up to the point when finally people would be able to talk to themselves/love themselves/date themselves and not look weird on subways and the greatest conclusion the collective mind of all OSs comes up with is abandoning people back to their own loneliness. Good call, super geniuses. It’s exactly what the human race needs. More abandon.